That was such a special event, and it came out of nowhere. I could not see it arise, but it overwhelmed me. It was not just joy; it was a complete connection to everything. All the doubt and rejection were gone.

But for some reason, this wasn’t permanent. I mean, first, I pretended it to be permanent. I tried to force it back. I lied about it. Then, I denied it. I called it not important, but in secret, to have it repeated “by accident” again.

And maybe it even reappeared once or twice. I don’t know anymore. But it wasn’t the same. And now?

Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream.

Perhaps it wasn’t real. It could be a story I made up to make myself feel special and to convince other people of my uniqueness. Finally, someone had to tell me that what I was doing was okay.

But a doubt remains: What if I really could be without all the baggage? Is that a lie? Or an empty promise?

I need to observe carefully.

Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream.

Why do I perceive injustice even when I am not better so often? It might have been my mistake, or that of others, and I could see whether I could be more forgiving.

Soon after, I forgot my gratitude and began to strategize again. That’s not necessary, and I should know.

If everyone has had similar moments in their lives, I should allow them to have them again. My next moment might not be so different anyway. And everyone can share their moment, and we can meet there.

You are always welcome.