There is so much going on, so it is hard to keep track. Did I like it? Did I embrace it? Was it helpful and supportive? Could I improve myself or my stance in this world? And honestly, everything often is exhausting. The more there is to integrate with my ideas, the more exhaustion seems to appear. Nothing seems to be enough, and maybe that is the point.

I am not that strong; I cannot take the force of the blow if I think about it. Yet, everything continues, and that is equally valid; however, I’m somewhat confused as to why confirmation of what is already there would even be required in the first place. Gratefulness appears like a show, support smells like a snobbish self-inflation, and serenity seems to be nothing but an escape. Yet, demanding to face every made-up challenge sounds very brutal to me.

Do I need a purpose to see a function? My actions are not only acceptable; they didn’t need my commentary and comparison in the first place. But what do I expect? It seems it is either an unfounded hope or a paralyzing fear that arises. And what do I remember? Do regret and pride really support me? And lastly, why do I lose myself in my current story? I will constantly indulge in or avoid, and certainly hoard facts and feelings, as if they would provide me with a lasting advantage.

There is surely memory, and indeed, there is some attention. But do I need to know my clarity? Is the realism that arises nothing more than another point of reference that invites me to more conflict? A simple general appreciation does not need to be a conscious acceptance of something specific. I can learn and acknowledge without recalling my preferences. And indeed, I can be both cautious and confident without turning my expectations into demands.

My chance of being open and available cannot be measured, as it would be after the act, and how could that be honest and authentic? Am I really heedless, or am I just harmless? Can I trust my fundamental values, or do I need to correct myself? Who is hurt? What is my problem? And can all my problems be joyful? If I think about it, my plans are nothing but a distraction. But maybe I don’t need to care too much.

I suppose everyone is aware that conscious acceptance can be demanding. Everyone might have felt moments of being overwhelmed and disconnected. However, there is the option to remind ourselves of our original completeness, that there is nothing to accept and nothing to reject, right from the start, all the way to the end. And it never ends.

You are always welcome.